Happy Birthday Faza ;'(

its had been 242 days...my birthday mean nothing this year..=(..for 2 years, he always with me on my birthday. but not this year.. sedey weiii. And that the reason why im missing this year on my birthday. im worried if i cant stand and cant control my emotion.

but still, im crying on my birthday. early morning gt text from sister, and already make me cry. i know they knew about it. i know, they noticed im still sad. and i know they try to cheer me up. thanks guys... love u all so much!!!

i dunno why it so difficult to forget him. i dont like the dreams. 5 times i have almost similar dream.. and all of it, related to him. not sure either it just a dream or a hint for me. really confusing. still crying..but better than before... my instinct still the same.. i really hope i throw away the instinct. its very strong... but really hope its not going to be happen. seriously, im in dilemma.. i want to forget him, and let him go. but dream is the one that still bothering my mind.

Ya Allah... i really need your help.. i really need your guidance. i dont what should i do. really confuse with my own life. i cant make decision. I'm too tired to face all of this...its hurt.. really hurt.. Please help me Ya Allah...=(

Comments

Really miss this place... Baitullah & Madinah Al Munawarah

Lamak dah x update my blog. Last sekali rasanya early of 2014. Now, mid of year 2014. How time flies.... Nothing much happen. Life goes on like usual. My parents baru balit umrah last night. And it make me think about this wonderful place. Baitullah and Kota Madinah. Seriously, really miss this place. Really want to go there again. Mesti dah banyak berubah. It has been 8 year after my hajj. I'm wondering how this place look like now. I miss my friend yg sama pergi haji, Azim and kakak2 & makcik2, especially Kak Zu and Kak Cik. Kak Zu, i still contact her. Kak Cik jak xda contact lagi. Makcik yang dua org ya entah apa khabar nak kah??? Doa yang terbaik untuk cdaknya. Hopefully masih sihat walafiat. And yessss... i reallllllllyyyyy miss my sarawak group!!!! yang sempoi & gila2... Ya Allah...rindu yang teramattttttttttttttt sangattttttttttttttt..... Semoga Allah terus murahkan rezekiku & dapat jejakkan kaki sekali lagi ke Bumi suci Mu Ya Allah..

Another lost!!!

Al Fatihah buat Allahyarham Razali Lantai..Another thalassaemic passed away.. Sedih, coz i know him.. Still remember how i teach him to inject Desferal himself first time, i think 4 years ago.. Very shy person..last sekali jumpanya last year March, during thalassaemia clinic, Miri-Limbang-Lawas.. Not sure cause of death. Terlupa nak tanya Misi Yong. Maybe iron overload, hypersplenism, cardiac failure, etc...Yang pasti nya start iron chelation quite late. Se. Ferritin pun tinggi juak. So, dunno which one nya pun reason. Yang pergi tetap pergi. Yang hidup perlu teruskan kehidupan. Walaupun bila dengar this kind of news reallyy make me down..but life must goes on... mcm yang selalu aku padah bila berik talk...no matter what happen in our life, life must goes on.... Al Fatihah...

Bad day..:'(

Oh my!!!!! what a bad day!!! Keta aku blm sebulan lgk, dah knk langgar..huhuhu....rasa nak nangis...nope bukan nak nangis..mmg dah nangis pun..Nsb kat ofis.. so blh tahan lagik. mun kat rmh mmg dah kembang mata..sob..sob... If my dad tahu, habis!!! i'm dead!!!! BTW, it's not my fault. Obviously not my fault. Sbb only have 2 lane, and suddently tat car menyelit sebelah kiri keta..dah lah dkt gila. mau nya x knk langgar.. so, semi parah.. Scratch and kemek and left door at passenger side x dapat di buka..sggh sadis di pagi hari. this kind of thing make me scared and worried nak drive. especially when @roundabout. before this, aku mmg fobia dgn roundabout. and now, this thing happened. Makin lah aku takut dgn roundabout. But i have to to go though that area everyday... No option. Ssh bila kita dah careful, tapi org lain sukati jak drive. Setiap kali nangga kereta, mesti nangis... Sedih giler wei!!!! Baru 3 minggu. Gik berbau keta baru gik ya...huhuhu... Faza plz be strong!!! S

♥zazythalassaemicladies♥

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