Day 180 a.k.a 6 months

It had been 6 month. Officially today...whats my feeling? Dunno.... definitely still a bit sad. But i think i felt much much better now. I can face it... ya... on and off.. i know, time will heals everything. But seriously it is not that easy. The biggest problem is, we work at same place.. i meet him almost everyday.. thats the hardest!!! I need courage for that!!!
I smile, I laugh.. but deep inside my heart... broken... totally injured..
Agreed bila org kata org yang paling kerap ketawa adalah orang yang paling sedih... that' s me!!!!😂
I dunno until when i can stand. Im trying my best... yes... im a bit rebellious nowadays. I alway break the rules. 😅
I just dont want to stay longer at office. I try to minimize my time .
I dream abt him a few time last week. Dunno what does it mean. I hope my bad instinct wont happen. The most important thing, i dont want to put any hope anymore. Putting too much hope will make me disappointed. So, better just leave it like this.. gambateh Faza... u can do it. Just rely on Allah.. He know better...

Comments

Really miss this place... Baitullah & Madinah Al Munawarah

Lamak dah x update my blog. Last sekali rasanya early of 2014. Now, mid of year 2014. How time flies.... Nothing much happen. Life goes on like usual. My parents baru balit umrah last night. And it make me think about this wonderful place. Baitullah and Kota Madinah. Seriously, really miss this place. Really want to go there again. Mesti dah banyak berubah. It has been 8 year after my hajj. I'm wondering how this place look like now. I miss my friend yg sama pergi haji, Azim and kakak2 & makcik2, especially Kak Zu and Kak Cik. Kak Zu, i still contact her. Kak Cik jak xda contact lagi. Makcik yang dua org ya entah apa khabar nak kah??? Doa yang terbaik untuk cdaknya. Hopefully masih sihat walafiat. And yessss... i reallllllllyyyyy miss my sarawak group!!!! yang sempoi & gila2... Ya Allah...rindu yang teramattttttttttttttt sangattttttttttttttt..... Semoga Allah terus murahkan rezekiku & dapat jejakkan kaki sekali lagi ke Bumi suci Mu Ya Allah..

Another lost!!!

Al Fatihah buat Allahyarham Razali Lantai..Another thalassaemic passed away.. Sedih, coz i know him.. Still remember how i teach him to inject Desferal himself first time, i think 4 years ago.. Very shy person..last sekali jumpanya last year March, during thalassaemia clinic, Miri-Limbang-Lawas.. Not sure cause of death. Terlupa nak tanya Misi Yong. Maybe iron overload, hypersplenism, cardiac failure, etc...Yang pasti nya start iron chelation quite late. Se. Ferritin pun tinggi juak. So, dunno which one nya pun reason. Yang pergi tetap pergi. Yang hidup perlu teruskan kehidupan. Walaupun bila dengar this kind of news reallyy make me down..but life must goes on... mcm yang selalu aku padah bila berik talk...no matter what happen in our life, life must goes on.... Al Fatihah...

Bad day..:'(

Oh my!!!!! what a bad day!!! Keta aku blm sebulan lgk, dah knk langgar..huhuhu....rasa nak nangis...nope bukan nak nangis..mmg dah nangis pun..Nsb kat ofis.. so blh tahan lagik. mun kat rmh mmg dah kembang mata..sob..sob... If my dad tahu, habis!!! i'm dead!!!! BTW, it's not my fault. Obviously not my fault. Sbb only have 2 lane, and suddently tat car menyelit sebelah kiri keta..dah lah dkt gila. mau nya x knk langgar.. so, semi parah.. Scratch and kemek and left door at passenger side x dapat di buka..sggh sadis di pagi hari. this kind of thing make me scared and worried nak drive. especially when @roundabout. before this, aku mmg fobia dgn roundabout. and now, this thing happened. Makin lah aku takut dgn roundabout. But i have to to go though that area everyday... No option. Ssh bila kita dah careful, tapi org lain sukati jak drive. Setiap kali nangga kereta, mesti nangis... Sedih giler wei!!!! Baru 3 minggu. Gik berbau keta baru gik ya...huhuhu... Faza plz be strong!!! S

♥zazythalassaemicladies♥

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