Lost Count

i dunno how many days already. don't want to count on it anymore. the more i count, the more i sad. so just let go... still sad, sometimes. 

 so many thing happened this couple of month. Gjull father admitted. About a month at ccu. i met his family. they knew me now. and yet, that guy still hanging around to seek attention. but sorry dude, u no longer in my life. not my priority anymore. i just want to forget u. You throw me away, and i'll do a same thing to you, throw you away, far far away from my life, even as a friend. You know nothing dude. How i struggle to get back my life. How i lost my happiness. How i cried almost everyday, just because losing you. So, i have decided, to forget anything (how i wish for that) about you. Assuming i never met you before. I dont care if you sad or disappointed or feeling of losing, because that what i felt when u leave me a years ago, and i think it worse than what you felt now. Its not revenge. I just protecting myself, from someone like you. Its hurt, its pain, but that is the only choice that i have. So, please be strong Faza. 

Allah take him from my life. But He give other people enter my life. Thanks Allah.

Back to Gjull, yaaa, his father finally discharged last friday. After 51 days admitted. Syukur. Hopefully, he gonna be fine, healthy like before. Power of pray i can say. Its quite surprising to see him healthy back after what happened before. Intubated, cpr, defit, infection, self extubate, so many thing. Yes, miracle just like Dr Khaw said. Even Dr Khiew also almost loose hope on him.but kuasa Allah. sikda org boleh lawan. I'm trying my best to help them. Give info as much as i can. Be with his family. Moral support that what people need when this kind of thing happened in their life. I knew how it feel. I almost lost someone that i love 4 years ago. The worse feeling ever i can say. But i know Gjull is very strong person. He handle his feeling very well. his the eldest, so he need to be strong.  

The progress? No idea. just rely on Allah. He know better and He's the best planner. Just hoping that, He ease everything for me...